I want to take the opportunity to place my thoughts in between the posts of me sharing my story. I hope they help in understanding who I am and the purpose behind me sharing my struggle with the world.
This is hard for me to write about all of these operations and medical procedures that I have gone through. I have not opened up about many of the things that I lived through because, I truly believed that talking about it would change nothing. I was wrong and I finally see that now. There are so many out there that are facing adversity in their lives and choose to keep it bottled inside and pushed way down. They do this for fear they will face judgement from those that are in their life. Judgement for something you have ZERO control over.
I want to talk about the person who brought me to finally understanding that enough is enough and it is time to start speaking out. That what I have been through will not be for nothing at all. I refuse to carry around a heavy heart my entire life because, of others beliefs about my health challenges.
Seven Bridges, is one of the most beautiful souls to ever have lived in my eyes. He is a ten-year old boy from Kentucky born to Tami Charles and was her only child. In January 2019 this young boy committed suicide because, of cruelty. Cruelty from ignorance. The young boy was born with concern with his intestine. It was unable to be corrected after 26 operations. The young boy knew nothing but, life with an ostomy bag. He did not ask to be different, nor did he need to be punished by others for it. The children at school belittled and teased him daily. He spent his life fighting to be accepted his whole life by others, just as I have. Seven did not have the heart to be cruel in return so instead he just prayed for the other children, and kept going on with his life the best he knew how to. I unlike Seven had the opportunity to fall in love, get married, and have a child. I know how it feels to be accepted by society because, you are what we referred to as, "normal". Seven was ripped of all those opportunities in life because, of other people's opinions of what he was in their eyes. How is this right? Where were the adults? The truth of it is, they were all there watching, knowing, and doing nothing about it at all. We all preach about "education" and how important it is in our world. Why were these children and adults not being educated about Seven's condition. Why were special accommodations not made for his situation?
There are many nights I lye awake thinking that if I had just spoken up sooner, Seven and those like him and I might still be here living. Just like they were meant to all along. Imagine for just a moment that you face a physical disability that is completely outside of anything you are able to control. Would it hurt to be rejected for that difference? How about years of ridicules'? Would you enjoy it? How would you handle it? We spend so much of our lives busy judging those around us, instead of trying to help.
I know we have all said or heard at one time or another that we are our own worst critic. No one is harder on us, than ourselves. Now imagine spending years upon years being beat up by those we must interact amongst. Then you go away to be alone only to attack yourself further internally. Would you want to quit?
I know I have not gotten to my ostomy procedure yet although, I will. It is the most difficult of operations for me to discuss because, it caused the most emotional, physical, and mental damage.
I want nothing more than to "help" because, compassion is something each of yearn for in times of struggle. Yet. when we see other struggling we are so hesitant to give the compassion that we so crave. It has to stop.
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